Someone has done a poll, guys. A movie poll. People have been asked something, and they have answered, and now we have a definitive list because of it. I do not know who decides who gets to be the official decider, but sometimes you’ve just got to accept these thing - sometimes, when an insurance company tells you something about a field in which they have zero expertise, you just have to take it as gospel.
Well thanks then, that at least today’s poll comes from Total Film, and is a poll about films. We’re in the right wheelhouse, at least.
The specific poll? Who is the greatest movie character of all time? Want to know? You can guess extremely easily, but if you’re still stuck, here’s the top 25:
25. The Dude (from The Big Lebowski)
24. Gollum
23. Darth Vader
22. Loki
21. Iron Man
20. R. P. McMurphy (from One Flew Over The Cuckoo’s Nest)
19. Harry Potter
18. Spider-Man
17. Maximus Decimus Meridius (from Gladiator)
16. Tyler Durden (from Fight Club)
15. Jules Winnfield (from Pulp Fiction)
14. Michael Corleone (from The Godfather)
13. The Bride (from Kill Bill)
12. Sarah Connor (from The Terminator)
11. Rocky Balboa
10. Princess Leia
9. The Joker
8. Gandalf
7. Hannibal Lecter
6. Travis Bickle (from Taxi Driver)
5. James Bond
4. Ellen Ripley (from Alien)
3. Han Solo
2. Batman
1. Indiana Jones
I mean, sure, it’s a basic list and all, but I guess you can’t really argue with it - they are all great characters. Of course, if I were to write a correct list of the 25 greatest movies characters, it would be entirely different. In fact, it would go something like this:
25. The “Happy the gold jacket’s yours Shooter’s gonna choke” guy from Happy Gilmore
24. The stormtrooper that bangs his head on the door in Star Wars
23. The guy that does all those flips and then gets immediately knocked out in Never Back Down
22. The exploding guy from Big Trouble In Little China
21. The Scorpion King from The Mummy Returns
20. The “Yo mama” guy from Maximum Overdrive
19. The guy who gets knocked out by a ghost in The Dark Knight Rises
18. The “Baaatmaan EEEEHHHH” man from Batman Forever
16. Jimmy Two Times from Goodfellas
15. The kid who points to his dick in Back To The Future III
13. Rick Smith, S.W.A.T in Reno 911: Miami
10. The “Get me OUTTA HERE” woman from Happy Gilmore
8. Peter Pitofski from The Aristocrats
6. That guy that gets cubed in Cube
4. The “weeooopeeeooo” girl from Kung Pow: Enter The Fist
1. Blade from Blade II obviously
I THINK YOU WILL AGREE THAT THAT IS AN OBJECTIVELY CORRECT LIST BYE.
(Image: Rex)