Despite feeling like we’ve only just got over one holiday of forced fun, Valentine’s Day is about to arrive armed with an anticipation of deep declarations of love and at least a good excuse for a fancy dinner.
But walk down a card aisle and the only feelings you’re sure to catch are ones of nausea. Garish red cards with gushy messages that you would never, ever say out of self-respect will have you thinking your partner will leave you if you get them one rather than cement your relationship status.
In the interest of not selling your soul, here are some alternative options that relay your realness and won’t leave either of you cringing:
For the couple who scroll together
Get it here.
For someone who isn’t sick of Trump
Get it here.
For those who like to Netflix and chill
Get it here.
For the cynic
Get it here.
For someone with an imagination
Get it here.
For the anti-consumerist
Get it here.
For the right-swipers
Get it here.
For The Walking Dead fan
Get it here.
For the confessor
Get it here.
For someone who’s not the average Joe
Get it here.
For the grumpy but soft
Get it here.
For the punny
Get it here.
For those who CBA
Get it here.
For the Game of Thrones fan who is not of many words
Get it here.