George Foreman has challenged Steven Seagal to a fight, because the world is drunk
Nothing makes sense anymore
If you find yourself reading headlines this year and thinking ‘wait, what?’, you’re not alone.
We thought 2016 was a bit out there, but 2017 has thrown up nonsensical news items such as the revelation that Grandad from Only Fools and Horses could have killed Hitler, and UKIP being accused of co-opting the Premier League logo. And that’s just in the last week.
Within the grand scheme of things, then, the idea of George Foreman challenging Steven Seagal to a fight – something that would have found its way into the ‘and finally’ section of a news broadcast a few years back – now almost seems sensible.
I mean, it’s still a ridiculous thing to have to read, but it’s genuine and, if we’re being honest, not even in the top 10 weirdest headlines of the year.
In fact, it makes perfect sense, and here’s why…
Steven Seagal, who now looks like a boss you have to fight in an old-school PS1 game, for some reason
George Foreman is a man who has five sons, all named George. He has probably had to deal with people not taking him entirely seriously at times.
He’s also an ex-boxer, which means he’s been game for a fight in the past.
Steven Seagal, meanwhile, now looks like a cross between Heihachi from Tekken 2 and the editor from the Spider-Man comics – two people who will stop at nothing to get what they want.
Seagal has also incurred the wrath of Foreman, for reasons unknown.
Maybe he’s tried to take a patent out for a fat-reducing grill. Or maybe Foreman wants to call time on his boxing career with the nice round number of 69 knockouts.
Either way, the former heavyweight champion of the world has challenged his compatriot to a 10-round match of boxing vs ‘whatever’, because he can.
No weapons, though, because he’s a reasonable man.
Steven Seagal has not tweeted since April, so there’s no guarantee he’ll even see the challenge immediately.
But maybe Foreman will interpret this as his potential opponent running scared.
Let’s be honest, this fight is about as likely to go ahead as Floyd Mayweather vs an actual horse, but we can at least set ourselves a slightly lower target of figuring out Foreman’s motives.
One thing is for sure: we’ll see at least one even weirder story before the end of the year.
(Images: Rex Features)
