We know sport and style rarely go together. But this gallery of hairstyle-related crimes is just unforgivable.
It may not surprise you to learn that a majority ply their trade as footballers, but all corners of the sporting world are represented. Approach with caution: bad barnets abound.
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(Images: Rex/Getty)
Chris Waddle
An all-time classic; many people thought that Waddle effortlessly gliding up and down the wing was due to his footballing skill. Not the case. Defenders were simply mesmerised by his terrible mullet.
Kevin Pietersen
Talented? Yes. Sometimes a bit brash? Also yes. And not helped by this early dyed skunk haircut. This is just not cricket Kevin.
Taribo West
Everyone remembers Taribo West's ridiculous green...things...on the top of his head. They just look stupid. Why, Taribo, why?
Andre Agassi
You just don't get photos like this any more, do you. If you can take your eyes off Andre's chest rug for a second, you'll also see some terrible untamed locks. God had his revenge on him though when baldness set in shortly afterwards. If you can't use it properly, then you can't use it at all.
Giovanni Simeone
Words simply fail us on this. So we'll say no more and try to forget we've ever seen this monstrosity.
David Seaman
Oh David, you had such smart hair for a while. And the 'tache was always excellent. But the ponytail? No, no and thrice no. The sight of Seaman falling back, helplessly trying to reach Ronaldinho's cross-shot in 2002 was made a hundred times worse by this haircut following it into the net.
David Beckham
We'll be fair to you David - most of your style efforts have been very, very good. And very few men look better in a suit than you do. But when it goes wrong, it goes very wrong, and this mohican was definitely one to forget.
Andy Murray
Long before his Wimbledon triumph, Andy Murray was a gangly youngster with terrible, wild hair. Little tip from us young Andy - get a decent haircut and you'll start doing really well. Don't ask us how we know, just go with us.
Ronaldo
Voted the worst haircut of all time by The Sun and we're not going to disagree. This 2002-era triangular nonsense looked awful, but didn't stop the real Ronaldo doing the business on the pitch as Brazil took home the World Cup.
Djibril Cissé
Cissé is a man of extremes in dress sense, behaviour and, above all else, hairstyles. And, without fail, they all look terrible. It looks like a toddler has drawn on him in white crayon.
Bobby Charlton
One from the archives: Bobby, growing a few strands of hair really long does not mean you've still got a full head of hair.
Carlos Valderrama
Memorably described by one commentator during Italia '90 as a 'human floormop', this is just wildly out of control. A magnificent player with a magnificent 'tache, but this is just too much Carlos.
Tim Tebow
Star quarterback Tim Tebow went for 'the monk' just to remind us all why no-one tends to go in for this haircut unless you want to spend a great deal of every day alone and in contemplation.
Barry Venison
Wanted: Barry Venison. For the twin crimes of terrible suits and a shocking mullet. Alive (and preferably sheared).
Cristiano Ronaldo
Cristiano Ronaldo is just too smooth. And this partially highlighted quiff effort is far too TOWIE for our liking.
David Gower
Like Andre, earlier in the gallery, you just don't get photos like this any more. Gower may have been an elegant striker of the ball, but his hair was reminiscent of a woolly jumper. Far too fluffy.
Chris Waddle (2)
A second appearance for Mr Waddle on the list, and it pains us to say that this was probably worse than the mullet. Gone is the party at the back, but it appears to have moved to the middle and become a square block. Just shocking.
David Beckham (2)
Likewise, Mr Beckham appears for the second time, with these awful cornrows. Not good David.
Abel Xavier
Abel Xavier has had a succession of shocking haircuts and this is one of the very best/worst: it looks like an ice cream on your head my friend.
Dennis Rodman
Rodman is a man who likes to experiment with his hair, almost always with dire consequences. Get rid of the green and he could be a Bradford City mascot though.
Gervinho
This shocking 'comb-forward-but-then-part-in-the-middle-and-couple-with-a-headband' effort is almost certainly the main reason Arsenal sold the Brazilian star this summer. Unforgivable.
Jason Lee
He's got a pineapple on his head.
Lasith Malinga
This is a mess Lasith. Get a sensible haircut right now.
Neymar
A dreadful effort from the Brazilian Neymar, who's had a few shockers in his time. There's a mullet back, an asymmetrical fringe and the top is stuck up. He must be having a laugh, surely?
Djibril Cissé (2)
We warned you Djibril. We warned you and you didn't listen.