Language is regressing.
We're not saying that from a linguistic high horse, our noses thrust firmly in a copy of the Oxford English Dictionary.
It's an observation of the rising power of the emoji - that in the age of instant communication, words are failing us and pictorial representations are finding growing preference. It's basically hieroglyphics and cave wall paintings all over again.
The Unicode Technical Committee (UTC) - keepers of all things emoji - has released a 67-strong set of 'character' candidates hoping to appear in 2016's Unicode 9.0 release (the code that unifies all pictorial-based emoji faces).
The final list of new emoji will be announced when the UTC meets in May 2016 - a meeting whose minutes are recorded exclusively in emoji (yeah, we made that up - but could you imagine?).
These are some of the faces we hope will be appearing next year.
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Cowboy face
For barn dances, hoedowns and descriptions of builders
Clownface
For nightmares
Drool face
For that moment you smell your housemate's cottage pie
Selfie
Because this is life now
'Call me' hand
Easily transformed into a 'booty call' emoji with the combination of a winky face
Bat emoji
For calling in vigilante justice
Bacon emoji
To be used every Saturday morning around 11am
Tumbler glass
For sophisticated nights in/Mad Men binge sessions
Modern pentathlon
Nope. We don't get this one either
Canoe
For when you're 'up shit creek'
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